Wilder Geese Chase

In order to prevent violent people from inflicting violence, controversial MP Wilder Geert has been chased out of the country. BBC link. Other bad foreigners who are to be banned from UK entry in similar legislation:

1. PJ O'Rourke. His book was known to cause extreme offence to all devotees of the lord David Icke. He won't be allowed any nearer than Lizard Point.

2. Edwin "Buzz" Aldrin. Controversial astronaut. It is rumoured that he has evidence that the earth is round. This has caused extreme offence to the National Flat Earth Society, and he will be stopped at all ports.

3. John Barrowman. Apparently he is gay. There must be some religious people who find this deeply offensive.

4. Daniel Dennett. He writes books that are a bit complicated. This is deliberate provocation of the large and respected national society of idiots.

5. Raymond Blanc. In an act of deliberate provocation to followers of the holy Brian, he publicly humiliated (and ate) a snail. Sick. And sacrilege.

These people are dangerous. Foreign Secretary David Willi-banned said: "We have profound commitment to freedom of speech, but we are also bloody scared."

Tweeting is for birds?

From JP on January 17th: Twitter is fast becoming my personal submarine and periscope to the ocean of the World Wide Web

From Ann on January 23rd: I think this year is Twitter’s year. I think their tipping point has been reached and passed.

From Stephen Fry just yesterday: Welcome to my twitterworld


But I'm still not sure about it. Two possible reactions:

From the stereotypical new woman, enthusiastic about this new way to communicate:

I am a twitter. Sexy, fun, dietin' manhunter.

Or from the stereotypical dinosaur, a guy who doesn't believe in all this new technology:

I am a twit. Terse, XY, fundie, tin man, hunter.

The same letters in the same order, just slightly different spacing.

Recipe to build a Kolkata suburb

Ingredients:
1. A few acres of land
2. A few thousand families

Cooking time:
Sixty years

For each family:
1. Fence of your personal area with bamboo and twine, then string up a temporary shelter in the middle of it.
2. When you can afford to, replace the temporary shelter with a mud shack, keeping a small plot to grow your vegetables or tether your goat
3. When you can afford to, replace the mud shack with a fairly solid brick and plaster structure
4. As funds allow, gradually add floors to give yourself more living space
5. Tear the whole house down and build a block of flats on the same little plot, extending right to the roadside. Goodbye green space, hello modern suburb.

For better or for purse

Last week I dropped my wallet at a market in a notorious Essex town. Five things that were in there:

1. Credit Card - I've heard that all its details may already be on sale in pubs across the land, but it would still be disconcerting to lose it.

2. Driving Licence - we don't actually need to carry this in the UK, but it's habit from my US days, and some form of Photo Id often comes in useful

3. Oyster Card - loads of free travel on the London public transport system for the lucky finder.

4. Agency access pass for the client site - sounds trivial, but it's one of the things I'd "miss" the most in the short term while corporate bureaucracy grinds away at a replacement

5. AA card. I don't have a drink problem, and wouldn't spout that quasi-religious crap even if I did, but I do think it's worth keeping roadside breakdown membership.

That leaves out various loyalty cards, cash cards and cash itself (no coins) together with random receipts. They are not in my top five.

However, despite the best efforts of the Daily Hatemail (no street is safe, thieving immigrants are everywhere) and of the Real Hustle (trust nobody, they're all out to scam you), within a few seconds a lady walked up to me and returned it. Everything still there.

There is such a thing as society.

Social Media in 33 words

Neil Perkin asks: I'd love to know in one sentence - what is your maxim for how best to engage and facilitate an online community?

Within 3 hours he had 17 responses from agency digital strategy leaders, media researchers, account planners, media owners, creatives, and some of the most renowned thinkers on social media strategy. But not from me.

And a slightly broader question, could I sum up the whole principle and regulation of online communities in just one sentence? Like this blog itself, the answer goes back to Common Sense:

"An online community is produced by our wants, and censorship of that community by our wickedness; the former promotes our happiness positively by uniting our affections, the latter negatively by restraining our vices."

That is an update of the very first published paragraph of Tom Paine in 1776. Still true today.

A Few Good Menu

Slightly personal note, we got the new V+ box yesterday. And still seeing adverts everywhere implying that television is unimaginable without Sky+, I will say again that Sky are only selling the idea of time-shift TV; compared to others, their user interface is just rubbish.

But while we are on the subject of menu options, another personal recommendation. For anyone with direct family members who have lived through a famine, food is a very precious thing. Today I can afford to never be hungry. And my simple plea: restaurants, I just want to go to a place that does not have prices on the menu.

I do not ever want to, even unconsciously, be thinking of incremental costs when asking for more. Equally, when entertaining in a public place, I don't want my guests to feel even the slightest hint of guilt when ordering. I'm not talking about an all-you-can-eat help-yourself buffet, there are plenty of those, I am simply referring to a good quality reasonably priced restaurant (not a tapas bar) where you pay a set fee per person and order whatever you like from an extensive menu. Sounds so obvious. Yet I only know of one in all London. There must be many more, but where are they?

I'm sure there are loads. After all, I don't expect a "pay-whatever-you-wish" place that relies on the generosity of customers. And as for "moral hazard" concerns, that establishments would be bankrupted by system abusers, that argument is garbage. It would apply even more to the thriving buffets where the big eaters can tuck in to their hearts' content. In other places like Red Corner there is much more control; each item is ordered and served individually, so the restaurant has far more ability to prevent abuse. It is a good business idea. It should be copied.

Beer, Music and Science

Loud music in bars encourages people to drink more, unless it drives them off. That's old news now, and we can attest from personal experience anyway.

The results, published online in Alcoholism: Clinical & Experimental Research, show that the louder the music, the more swiftly the drinkers finished their beer, ordered more – or left.

But though I was not very impressed by that conclusion, I was very impressed by the research of Katherine Sanderson of Nature. She simply looked at some of the other publications of Nicolas Guéguen, Professor of Behavioural sciences at the Université de Bretagne-Sud who led the study. A few examples of his published research from his website:

1. Semantically induced love and helping behavior

2. The domestic dog as a facilitator in social interaction: An evaluation on helping and courtship behaviors.

3. The effects of women’s cosmetics on men’s courtship behavior.

4. The effect of a woman’s smile on men’s nonverbal behavior.

5. Women’s eye contact and men’s later interest: Two field experiments

Well done to Katherine for the spotting them, that is real research. And well done to Nicolas for getting away with it.

The Economics of Acting

Not the acts that candidates put on to feign corporate enthusiasm that I noted earlier, this is about the real thing.

It's almost a recession, it is getting harder for many people to find work in many industries. But my Dad keeps getting calls from his agent; why? Obviously he is a great actor, his legendary religious work proves that, but there may be broader economic reasons too. According to professional screenwriter John August:

Casting people are having a hard time finding actors of a certain age, especially minorities, for episodic parts. These are the "day players" — roles in which an actor might have a scene or two in a given episode, never to return.

Day players aren’t extras. There is actual acting required. Casting directors will bring in a few candidates to read for the part, and the producers/director will pick. A good day player can really elevate a scene. A bad day player is a disaster.

If you’re trying to cast a day player in their 20s (say, a car wash attendant), it’s easy. You’ve got thousands of people to choose from. Even if you need a specific characteristic — say, Russian-speaking — you’re going to have great candidates.

But according to the screenwriter, there is a huge shortage of older ethnic folks who can perform on cue. He suggests some reasons in the article, clearly being only a day player is unlikely to satisfy a lifetime's aspiration for the ambitious migrant, additionally perhaps the career choice of "actor" was not an acceptable one for many ethnic groups, perhaps some older first-generation immigrants simply cannot speak English clearly enough while those who are more eloquent and integrated and educated already feel financially secure.

My family is full of exceptions.

The New Society

I mentioned it back in the old world, but on those rare occasions when it reflected its tagline, The Real Hustle was great television. Patronising perhaps, but we all draw some pleasure from seeing the comeuppance of selfish idiots who thought they could make a quick killing.

Increasingly however, the programme does not trade on the greed but instead on the generosity and kind spirits of the supposed "victims". It suggests that everyone who asks for help should be treated as a crook, every id displayed to you should be treated as a fake id, everyone who stops you to ask for directions is just trying to pick your pocket. It may be true, but it is evil. It is the opposite of civilised society.

But like the greatest creation of Jim Steinman, there is hope in the box. On the internet, it pays to be generous. Provide more links out and more people will link in. I'm paraphrasing Neil Perkin here, but the more that you drive people away, the more you will draw people in. A great business model. As Tim Berners-Lee seems to be saying more and more, the web is not technology, it is people connected. It is society. Common Sense.